Getting over a broken heart is never easy. After all, we loved and trusted our partner, and no matter what the reason for the break up, the loss of that love and trust hurts. But in the end, a broken heart usually makes us stronger and helps us be a better partner in our next relationship. There is an old Hasidic saying, “There is nothing as whole as a broken heart.” Healing will with time, but in order to move on as quickly as possible and be able to love again, it is helpful to keep a few tips in mind.
Experience the pain – Although it is tempting to try to avoid feeling the pain of a broken heart (what sane person would not?), it is important that you go through it. Pushing your feelings of pain aside does not allow you to mourn the relationship sufficiently to completely let it go. When the time comes to move on to another relationship, the unresolved pain can get in the way of developing love and trust again with a new partner.
Hide your ex on social networking sites – There is nothing that aggravates a broken heart more than seeing your ex’s posts on Facebook about what a great time he or she had while skiing with friends last weekend. Even if you expect to remain friendly, it’s a good idea to hide their activity for a while.
Try something new – At first it’s hard even looking around your flat without being reminded of the things you used to do together with your partner. So it’s important to develop interests and activities that are all your own. Try starting some new project or skill like learning to knit (which has been found to reduce depression), or maybe try that cooking class that you have always been interested in.
Laugh and cry a lot – Rent a few classic comedies or watch Old Jews Telling Jokes on YouTube and laugh until you cry. Both laughter and crying have been found to relieve stress, lessen pain and boost your immune system; the perfect balm for a broken heart.
Do something nice for someone else – Giving assistance to someone in need helps to build your self-esteem and makes you appreciate the good things you have in your life. It also serves to direct your attention away from your broken heart and redirect it towards making the world a better place, which boosts happiness.
The most important thing to remember is to remain hopeful. Your bashert is out there somewhere waiting for you, and once you have recovered from the pain of your broken heart, you will meet him or her with a whole heart that is stronger for having weathered the storm.
