In many Jewish circles, particularly those who are religiously observant, dating is no game. Dating is not meant for the purpose of entertainment as it is in some other cultural circles. It is actually a matter of great seriousness. According to Jewish law, people do not date until they have reached an age of maturity, when they are emotionally ready to seek out a life partner. Young people do not date simply for fun and people do not “play the field” to find a partner. This is why a matchmaker is often used for bringing people together.
In the strict Orthodox Jewish circles, there is no intermingling of the sexes allowed. This makes it necessary for some third party, such as a friend, family member or matchmaker to play a vital role in bringing potential partners together. Marriage is one of the most important foundations of Jewish life, and a matchmaker is said to have performed a mitzvah by bringing people together in this holiest of unions.
An experienced matchmaker does a considerable amount of research on each of the parties who they are committed to helping. In order to do this, they must work closely with each person’s own inner circle of family and friends and ask a wide range of questions to understand the needs and wishes of the person seeking a spouse. The primary goal before allowing two potential partners to meet is to ensure that they both share the same goals, values, etc. This information will help the matchmaker decide upon compatibility before the first meeting.
When the dating does begin, it is with marriage in mind. Not only does the couple have marriage in mind, they must seriously discuss the matter. This prevents the wasting of time because according to the Torah, finding your other half is a dear thing in the eyes of G-d. Although the practice of using a matchmaker has always been followed by Orthodox Jews, more and more modern Jews are reverting back to the practice because they have had no luck in finding their life partner on their own. While some people still prefer to “do it themselves”, others are finding luck in love by using a matchmaker like their ancestors did.
