by Dr. Terri Orbuch, The Love Doctor®

Do you know what the “right partner” would look like if you met him/her today? What specific qualities are important to you in a romantic partner?

There are many different qualities that you look for in a romantic partner. Most people don’t take the time to think about what they want in a romantic relationship (or in a partner) until they are already in a relationship, or until they are dealing with a relationship that doesn’t work. Before you jump back into the dating world (or if you’re already there, step back for just a few minutes….and) take the time to ask yourself: “What do I need or want in a partner?

Studies show that people have 3 categories of preferred qualities:

  • the non-negotiable partner social attributes or physical features (e.g., age, body type, economic stability),
  • the must-have partner preferred personality or relationship characteristics (e.g., easy-going, communication skills, sense of humor), and
  • the relationship qualities that you need to be compatible or similar with you (e.g., similar views on family or health, political attitude that resonates with you, same religion).


In addition, you have a set of deal-breakers or partner traits that are most problematic to you. These are the partner characteristics that you just can’t tolerate or allow in a partner (e.g., substance abuse/use, bad habits, toxic past). All of these qualities are different for everyone and vary from person to person.

Defining the type of partner you want to be with is a little like making a shopping list before you head out to the grocery store. It streamlines the process, keeps you from making random choices, and helps you to not waste time. It also greatly improves your chances of finding that special someone for you!

Start Now and download your Work-Sheet and create Your Ideal Partner Shopping List! Complete the Work-Sheet and request Your Complimentary Consultation per email:

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